Finding Success: What Is It, Really?

Redefining Success To Find Your Path to a Life You Love

Success: It's a word we all hear and strive toward, but how do we truly define it? Is it wealth? Fame? Recognition? Or is it something deeper—something more meaningful? As a life coach specializing in authenticity, I believe that success isn’t one-size-fits-all. It’s about what resonates with you personally, what makes you feel fulfilled, and aligned with your authentic self. The sooner we recognize this, the sooner we can create our own version of success. In this article, we’ll break down society’s standard definition of success and help you craft your own path. 

Society's Definition of Success

For years, society has defined success in narrow terms: achieving a prestigious job, earning a high salary, gaining fame, or accumulating material wealth. We’re bombarded with the message that these external markers are the key to a fulfilled life. But in our relentless pursuit of these goals, we often forget to ask ourselves: What does success look like for me?

Success has become synonymous with wealth, status, and recognition. From an early age, we’re conditioned to chase these goals, believing they will bring us happiness and fulfillment. Society paints a picture of success as a life of luxury, public admiration, and personal achievement. Social media further amplifies these ideals, constantly showcasing the "perfect lives" of others, making it easy to fall into the trap of thinking that success is all about appearances and approval.

However, when we focus only on these external markers, we often find that they don’t bring the satisfaction we expect. In fact, the pursuit of societal success can leave us feeling hollow. Even after we achieve what we’re told we should want—a luxurious home, a high-paying job, social status—we may still find ourselves asking, “Is this all there is?”

The problem is that these markers of success are not aligned with who we truly are. They don't take into account our unique values, desires, or dreams. The constant chase for wealth, fame, and recognition can lead to burnout, anxiety, and a deep sense of dissatisfaction. As Albert Schweitzer wisely said, “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”

Living authentically—by aligning our lives with our personal values and passions—is where true success begins. It’s about finding fulfillment not in meeting societal expectations but in creating a life that reflects who we are and what matters most to us.

Let's explore how to redefine success on your own terms, moving beyond society’s narrow definition to create a life that is truly meaningful and fulfilling.

The Importance of Finding Personal Fulfillment

True fulfillment begins with self-reflection—a process of looking inward to discover what genuinely matters to you. In a world that often prioritizes external achievements and social validation, it’s easy to lose sight of your own values, passions, and desires. But real fulfillment comes from understanding and aligning with what truly resonates with you, rather than simply conforming to society’s expectations.

Start by asking yourself: What brings me joy? What makes me feel purposeful and alive? These questions are your guide to living authentically, helping you define success on your own terms. When you recognize what genuinely matters to you, you reclaim control over your life, setting a course toward deep and lasting contentment.

Aligning with your personal values means living in a way that reflects your true self—often in ways that diverge from conventional paths. For example, you might choose a career that aligns with your passions rather than one that offers financial security or social prestige. You may prioritize quality time with loved ones over the pursuit of promotions or material possessions. Living authentically means making choices based on what feels right for you, even if it challenges societal norms.

As Maya Angelou wisely said, “Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” This definition of success emphasizes self-acceptance, joy in the process, and pride in your actions. It’s not just about reaching a destination—it’s about enjoying the journey and being proud of how you live each day.

When you live authentically, you create a life that is uniquely yours, filled with fulfillment and happiness that no external validation can provide. Embracing your true self and following your own path may require courage, but it leads to a deeper, more lasting sense of success and satisfaction.

Steps to Define Personal Success

Defining personal success is a deeply personal journey. It involves understanding yourself on a profound level and taking intentional steps that align with your core values and passions. Success is not a one-size-fits-all concept—it looks different for everyone, and that’s what makes it beautiful. What success means to you may be completely different from someone else’s version, and that’s perfectly fine. What’s important is that you honor your own vision for success, whether that involves a fulfilling career, meaningful relationships, a balanced lifestyle, or inner peace and happiness.

Success is yours to define—no one else’s. Don’t let external pressures shape your vision. Take time to reflect on what you truly want out of life and create a path that aligns with your desires. Here’s a roadmap to guide you in finding and achieving your unique definition of success:

1. Self-Reflection

The first step is introspection—taking the time to reflect on what truly matters to you. Start by identifying your core values, interests, and aspirations. Reflect on what brings you joy and fulfillment, beyond societal expectations. This clarity will help you define what success means for you, personally.

To help with this process, consider engaging in activities like journaling, meditation, or simply spending quiet time alone. Ask yourself questions like:

• What activities make me feel most alive?
• What values do I want to guide my life?
• What does true happiness look like for me?

If you need support, I’ve created a reflection guide to help you dive deeper into self-reflection. Click here to download it.

2. Goal Setting

Once you have a clearer sense of your values and aspirations, it’s time to set meaningful, actionable goals that reflect what you truly want to achieve. These goals should be rooted in your personal vision of success, not societal standards.

For example, if you value creativity and connection, your goals might involve starting a creative project or nurturing deeper relationships. Ensure that your goals are specific and align with what genuinely matters to you.

To help you set goals that feel good and are sustainable, I’ve created a webinar that walks you through the process. Check out the Setting Resolutions That Work Webinar. 

Remember to break down your larger vision of success into smaller, achievable steps. This way, you create a clear path forward and experience a sense of accomplishment along the way.

3. Taking Action

With your goals in place, it’s time to take action. Whether you’re pursuing a passion project, shifting to a new career path, or building meaningful relationships, moving toward your goals is key. Break them down into manageable steps and create a plan to move forward.

Embrace the journey and stay committed, even when obstacles arise. Keep in mind that the process of working toward your own version of success is as valuable as the end result.

4. Letting Go of External Approval

A major step in redefining success is letting go of the need for external validation. It’s essential to resist the pressure to conform to others' expectations or seek approval based on societal standards. Instead, focus on living authentically and making choices that reflect your personal values.

Trust your judgment and have confidence in your decisions. When you release the need for external approval, you create the space to live a more genuine, fulfilling life.

5. Celebrate Your Progress

Success isn’t just about the end goal—it’s about the journey. Celebrate every small victory along the way. Whether you achieve a goal or simply learn something new, take pride in your progress.

6. Embrace Your Imperfections

Perfection is an illusion. Personal growth happens when you embrace your imperfections and accept yourself as you are. Let go of the need to be "perfect" in the eyes of others. Embracing your true self is a powerful part of the journey toward success.

7. Keep Evolving

As you grow and experience life, your definition of success may evolve. Don’t be afraid to adjust your goals and dreams as your understanding of what truly matters deepens. Success is a dynamic journey, and being open to change is key to living authentically.

By following these steps, you can redefine success in a way that is deeply personal and fulfilling. It’s about creating a life that reflects who you truly are and what you genuinely value. Embrace your unique path, and remember that personal success is about living in harmony with your authentic self.